Be prepared that this post is probably going to have a lot of complaining in it :)
How far along? 39 weeks. Didn't get this far with Brogen he was a scheduled c section since he was breech and I didn't want to get this far with Hallie but hear I am and I am starting to think I have another stubborn child. Heaven help me!
Maternity clothes? Busting out of the biggest ones I have, I had to go buy another shirt the other day just to get me by. I have one pair of pants and 2 skirts and a couple shirts that still fit and I just wear them over and over again. I don't want to spend any more money on maternity clothes!!!
Best moment the past few weeks: When Brogen laid his head on my belly for a minute and then patted it with his hand and said hello to baby Hallie. Also I tended a 3 month old for Jared's cousin and Brogen couldn't have been more adorable with him. When he spit up on me Brogen ran and got some toilet paper and was wiping it off me. He was showing him his toys and tickling him. It made me happy to see what a good big brother he is going to be.
Miss Anything? Pretty much everything about not being pregnant. I miss the most playing and chasing Brogen. It hurts to sit it hurts to stand so I just feel like the poor kid is pretty neglected by me. Also our snuggle time when he would watch a cartoon. He used to snuggle up on my lap with a juice and his blankee and I would love on him. He tries to still do it but its so uncomfortable for both of us that he says your belly is too big and moves to another spot.
Movement: Ya but its getting less and less the bigger she gets. A couple of times she has had me worried and so I drink a Pepsi and that usually gets her moving.
Food Cravings: Pizza Factory salad bar. I think I could eat there everyday if my budget permitted. I LOVE it and I figure all those veges can't hurt me right? If I just didn't get the bread twist with it.......
Anything making you queasy or sick: No, water is actually starting to be my friend again. I have no idea what that was all about.
Gender: Girl. It better be.
Labor Signs: Woke up the other night in lots of pain in back and stomach. Got nauseous and started throwing up. Contractions started and were consistently 10 minutes apart then 9 and 8. Went to labor and delivery hoping they could tell if I was in active labor so Jared could head home from up north. The monitored me for an hour or so and my contractions were 5-8 minutes apart but were not painful and not doing anything so they sent me packing. So embarrassing and disappointing all at the same time. I have felt like I had a kidney stone for awhile now and we think that's what caused all this trouble. The pain I was having started contractions.
Symptoms: Swollen ankles, hands, face, body, you name it, I am bigger than a buffalo.
Belly Button in or out? Out and stretched so far I think my skin is going to bust
Wedding rings on or off? Off, and I miss it. Its been months since I have been able to wear it and people probably think I am single and just got knocked up.
Happy or Moody most of the time: I would say a little of both. This waiting game is torture and especially worrying about not having a husband home when I go into labor. Just so many unknowns it is driving me crazy.
Looking forward to: Getting this baby OUT!!!!!!!! Is that really too much to ask? At this point I just want her out on her due date and not a week after. Or even a day after come to think of it.
Well what's a post without some funny things Brogen says. He is constantly surprising me with the things that come out of his mouth. Sometimes I have to try hard not to laugh and other times I have to try hard not to spank his butt. He can be quite mouthy! Mostly he just turns my own words around on me and puts me in my place :)
He started saying stupid ALOT! I got after him and told him that it is not a nice word and that Heavenly Father doesn't like it when we say it. Well what do you know he learned that word from me I found out because he is constantly reminding me "Mommy we don't say stupid" Its not a nice word." sometimes he will throw in there Heavenly Father doesn't like it. He obviously is too young to understand the do as I say not as I do rule :)
One night I tucked him into bed and was leaving his room and he shot up in bed and said "Wait!" "um Mommy I think that your boobies are falling!" I have never said the word boobies to him, when he asks what they are I tell him they are my boobs but I have no idea where he got boobies from. He is right though, they are falling clear to the ground. What a perceptive, concerned little boy I have.
We were in JoAnn's getting some fabric and I put a couple bolts in my cart and he looked back there and said, " put it back Mommy we aren't getting that". I think he has heard that a time or two...
He was still saying poop a lot and thought it was so hilarious and one night when we were with Jared's dad Brogen said it and Paul said "that is bathroom talk". We said ya that is potty talk so now no one can say poop because it is potty talk unless we are talking about going to the bathroom then its ok, or if Brogen feels like saying it then its ok. Brogen's rules...........
I can't remember where we were but Brogen wanted to leave and he said, "Cmon its time to go little lady"
At the babysitter's house the other day they were outside playing and he yelled " Mara we have a big problem" so she went over there and it was a spider on his bike. Obviously I have passed my love of spiders onto him.
The other night I kind of had a breakdown and I tried to hide in the bathroom so he wouldn't see me crying but he found me. I think it was a combination of how hugely pregnant and emotional I am, being lonely without the hubby, (more on that later) being so tired, and just a few other things that have been going on. He was so concerned and said whats wrong Mommy and gave me a hug. Then he got some toilet paper to wipe my eyes but he was really poking me in the eyes and it made me laugh. Then he said your not sad anymore and gave me another hug. He can be so sweet and tenderhearted.
I am really afraid of how my relationship with Brogen is going to change when Hallie comes. I can't even imagine loving another kid like I love Brogen and even though he is 3 1/2 I feel like because of working that I haven't had enough time with just him and I. I am afraid he will think I love her more than him just because of the time it takes to care for a newborn and I know he is going to be wanting my attention and I won't always be able to give it to him and it makes me sad. I know it will all work out and its both scary and exciting to think of what 2 kids will bring to our household. We are so excited to see what a great big brother Brogen is going to be to Hallie and we can't wait to see what our little Hallie is going to look like and how she will be. So she needs to get here already!!!!!!
courage for the week 5.28.17
2 hours ago